I’m a stand up guy. Especially when compared to someone sitting down.

“After a lot of stalling and posturing, I finally admitted I had feelings for he…”

“Throw a pair of Band-Aids over your eyelids, and open your eyes to your wounds.”

“I’m such an alcoholic that I go to church just for communion.”

“The fastest I’ve ever fallen in love is 17 miles per hour. But I was safe, beca…”