I’m in good shape. That shape is round.


“Sitting on my ass all day long is fun and all, but I’d rather sit on your ass. …”

“The fastest I’ve ever fallen in love is 17 miles per hour. But I was safe, beca…”

“I’m always the last in love by exactly one person.”

“I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. …”