I’m wearing shoes made of sea foam, and I am here to seduce the elderly. If you brought the geriatrics, then I brought the jellyfish.

“2 out of 4 numbers prefer being in the bottom 50 percent. Half of all lovers al…”

“A blanket could be used to stop gun violence. Make sleep, not war.
”

“The lights might have dimmed, but I blinked at that moment so I didn’t notice. …”

“You made me dinner, so I made myself vomit—twice. Once to clear some room in my…”