I’m willing to die for the woman I love. I just want to take 75 years to do it.

“If I were a hairy man, I’d never pat myself on the back, because with all that …”

“A brick could be used to make it harder for people to achieve their dreams. A b…”

“A blanket could be used as a cat. Wait, I have that backwards. A cat could be u…”

“I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. …”