Is there relationship insurance? You know, in case someone steals your significant other? If not, there should be.

“I took a vow to stop taking things.”

“To Do Today, 1/17/081. Sit and think2. Reach enlightenment3. Feed the cats”

“A brick could be used to block out the pain, if you use it to first inflict pai…”

“Before I sold used cars, I sold used horses. Mostly to glue factories.”