It's rude to discuss your wife with your girlfriend

“You should get a better boyfriend. One with an IQ higher than a turnip.”

“Jack narrowed his eyes. “Why can’t you be just a hundred percent good or a hund…”

“He shook his head again. 'I just can't figure out why anyone in his right head …”

“A million possible endearments ran through his head. But he said, “Help.”