It’s sad when people want to wear out a perfectly good last name when they don’t have any other pants. Idea for a pen name: Johnny Nudity.

“The lights might have dimmed, but I blinked at that moment so I didn’t notice. …”

“There were two chairs, but there were three of us. So, being the gentleman I am…”

“I am not a professionally trained professional. I am an amateur professional!”

“If death is the end of life, what is birth the end of?”