It’s true, I almost hit him. And I would have too, if at the last moment he didn’t swerve out of the way.

“I got a new car. I just need to put it together. They’re easier to steal piece …”

“A blanket could be used to fill the night sky with smoke, if you use it to suff…”

“I want a trophy wife. I’ll keep her on the shelf next to my future Nobel peace …”

“People ask me all the time, “Jarod, how come you are so much more romantic than…”