Jarod Kintz Day—it’s not just my birthday, but it should be a holiday that’s mandatory to celebrate, punishable by death if you don’t. It’ll be a holiday that honors freedom.


“I’m sad that I’m leaving, but I’m happy that I’m going. The thing is, I am in l…”

“I need love. Here’s a list of other things I need: eggs, butter, flour, and sug…”

“The people need to know that the people need to know. And I’m just the man to l…”

“I don’t need a coffee cup. That’s what hands were invented for. That’s also why…”