Sometimes the thing that brings us together also pulls us apart. Sort of like a zipper.

“I don’t just have one mustache, I have two. You can hardly notice them, though,…”

“A candle that smells like asshole would be an instant hit in prison.”

“Would you rather have sight, or insight? I’d rather have a double cheeseburger.”

“The day my dad left my mom and I was the second saddest day of my life. The sad…”