The best part about being a waiter is all that waiting. Use that time wisely. Try making it as an actor.

“I’m feeling a little under the weather. But once I open my umbrella, I’m sure I…”

“Your deodorant smells like my armpit. And yet I get no royalty from the manufac…”

“Love is a peaceful feeling, like a flower hugging a butterfly.”

“I am the sum of all somes, with a few scattered nones and nuns thrown in (thoug…”