The internet's a great way to meet people. You never really know someone until you see their fake profile.

“My nose is so big it’s like a mountain ridge on my face. Ladies, you could Mt. …”

“Two hearts that beat as one, and they’re both mine. I’ve got them hooked up to …”

“When I wear my confessional glove it’s super tempting to give myself a velvet h…”

“I want to save the environment. I like being green as much as the next Smurf.”