The quickest way to alter an altar is not with a hammer, or even religious deconstruction, but with a typo.

“I’m a stand up guy. Especially when compared to someone sitting down.”

“My fur coat doesn’t need to be dry cleaned, because it’s self-cleaning. It’s co…”

“It’s not uncommon for me to be early to meetings by as much as a half a gallon.…”

“-I’m looking for a man—
-There are several suspects in Topeka, Ks. that match t…”