There are 26 characters in the alphabet, and what characters they are! Especially Q.

“I keep my love in the fridge, next to my meat, because you simply can’t beat it.”

“I’ve had the paperwork sitting on my desk for the past nine months, waiting to …”

“I always wear size 14 boat shoes that are so old they could have been built by …”

“I love like an albino. But I don’t want to get sunburned, so would you please p…”