Trying to get today’s Republican to accept basic facts is like trying to get your dog to take a pill. You have to feed them the truth wrapped in a piece of boloney, hold their snout shut, and stroke their throats. And even then, just when you think they’ve swallowed it, the spit it out on the linoleum.

If conservatives get to call universal healthcare ‘socialized medicine’ then I get to call private for-profit healthcare ‘soulless, vampire bastards making money off human pain’.

Author: Bill Maher