When tragedy befalls me and someone says, "Better you than me," I always reply, "Yes, I am better than you.

“I’ve been to the Big House. Not prison, but the Biltmore Estate.”

“In the midst of the mist lies a mystery that only The Mythical Mr. Boo can solv…”

“A blanket could be used to cover Mt. Rushmore. But if you rush more, you’re goi…”

“I’d like to make the argument that The Cars were the first garage band.”