Whether you’re being good, or you’re up to no good, try not to look guilty.

“While I’m no Major League Baseball prospect, I have thrown a few no-hitters in …”

“It’s easier to win an argument over a dinner you’re paying for.”

“My hair isn’t turning gray, but it is losing its flavor. It used to taste like …”

“My face doesn’t match my personality. Maybe it would if instead of a mouth I ha…”