You can’t believe every word you read while watching TV. (Even with closed captioning turned off).

“When I'm in yoga class, and I'm in the Tree Pose, I always pretend I'm the Tree…”

“There’s a hair in my soup. That’s the problem of using my helmet as a bowl.”

“Eleven levitating leviathans couldn’t spell seven if you spotted them the Even …”

“I would tell you I hope you find what you seek in life, but your problem is you…”