You have the opposite of poker face. You have like.. miniature golf face.

“in stillness, I watched myselfget eaten by mosquitoes... the itch was maddening…”

“my fourth day in Rome, my shadow has still not darkened the door way of a churc…”

“Nothing is so essential as dignity…Time will reveal who has it and who has it n…”

“What kind of dog is that?" I would always give the same answer: "She's a brown …”