А вот на подходе уже, если хотите знать, дяденьки, специальные пишущие машинки, пока еще только для нас, прозаиков. На этих машинках установлены электронные цензурные ограничители. Представляете? Печатаешь ты двумя пальцами «жопа», а на бумаге выходит: «окорока», «пятая точка», «афедрон» и уж в самом крайнем случае «ж» с тремя точками.
Arkady StrugatskyПромеж досок я его видел!
Ольга ГромыкоPolitical prisoners describe:
- extreme physical and emotional torture
- distortion of language, truth, meaning and reality
- sham killings
- begin repeatedly taken to the point of death or threatened with death
- being forced to witness abusive acts on others
- being forced to make impossible "choices"
- boundaries smashed i.e. by the use of forced nakedness, shame, embarrassment
- hoaxes, 'set ups', testing and tricks
- being forced to hurt others
Ritual abuse survivors often describe much the same things.
Tags: truth tricks murder death religion faith psychology secret secrets rape killing exploitation crime torture healing prisoners political survivors recovery child-abuse ritual-abuse voluntary mind-control mental-health-professionals survivorship psychology-quotes childhood-abuse abusive satanic-ritual-abuse abuse-sexual-abuse childabuse child-pornography abusive-government political-prisoners
Just start somewhere," Dr. Marshall had said to me as I ground a banana-pineapple one to bits between my teeth. "It doesn't have to be at the beginning." She'd pulled her legs up, Indian-style, letting the legal pad she'd been holding drop to the floor.
"I thought everything always had to start at the beginning," I said.
"Not in this room," she said easily. "Go ahead, Caitlin. Just tell me one thing. It gets easier, I promise. The first thing is always the hardest."
I looked down at my hands, stained mildly red from the particularly sticky watermelon Rancher. "Okay," I said, reaching forward to take another one out of the bowl, just in case. She was already sitting back in her chair, readying herself for whatever glimpse I would give her into the mess I'd become. "What was the name of Pygmalion's sister?"
She blinked, twice, obviously surprised. "Ummm," she said, keeping her eyes on me. "I don't know."
"Rogerson did," I told her. "Rogerson knew everything.
Tags: inspirational quote depression treatment shocking abusive realationship
So often survivors have had their experiences denied, trivialized, or distorted. Writing is an important avenue for healing because it gives you the opportunity to define your own reality. You can say: This did happen to me. It was that bad. It was the fault
Ellen BassTags: innocence reality lies courage relationships shame guilt responsibility healing victim recovery blame child-abuse sexual-abuse survivor abuse childhood-abuse emotional-abuse abusive
I think maybe, when I was very young, I witnessed a chaste cheek kiss between the two when it was impossible to avoid. Christmas, birthdays. Dry lips. On their best married days, their communications were entirely transactional: 'We're out of milk again.' (I'll get some today.) 'I need this ironed properly.' (I'll do that today.) 'How hard is it to buy milk?' (Silence.) 'You forgot to call the plumber.' (Sigh.) 'Goddammit, put on your coat, right now, and go out and get some goddamn milk. Now.' These messages and orders brought to you by my father, a mid-level phonecompany manager who treated my mother at best like an incompetent employee.
Gillian FlynnTags: love family parents silence communication fight childhood mother parenthood fighting depression parents-and-children heartbreak relationship sexism divorce father abuse fights love-lost childhood-memories abusive-relationships bad-parenting abusive abusive-relationship broken-home
...my father, [was] a mid-level phonecompany manager who treated my mother at best like an incompetent employee. At worst? He never beat her, but his pure, inarticulate fury would fill the house for days, weeks, at a time, making the air humid, hard to breathe, my father stalking around with his lower jaw jutting out, giving him the look of a wounded, vengeful boxer, grinding his teeth so loud you could hear it across the room ... I'm sure he told himself: 'I never hit her'. I'm sure because of this technicality he never saw himself as an abuser. But he turned our family life into an endless road trip with bad directions and a rage-clenched driver, a vacation that never got a chance to be fun.
Gillian FlynnTags: love rage family parents silence communication fight childhood mother anger parenthood fighting malice parents-and-children heartbreak sexism fury divorce terror father abuse scared heartbroken fights love-lost childhood-memories abusive-parents emotional-abuse abusive mental-abuse broken-home
My dad had limitations. That's what my good-hearted mom always told us. He had limitations, but he meant no harm. It was kind of her to say, but he did do harm.
Gillian FlynnTags: harm family parents relationships childhood hurt mother scars parenthood indoctrination parents-and-children heartbreak loyalty divorce father limits limitations abuse heartbroken brainwashing false-beliefs love-lost childhood-memories emotional-abuse bad-parenting abusive psychological-abuse mental-abuse broken-home didn-t-mean-it
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