I'm twenty-nine, happily single and getting it on a regular basis' I said, enjoying the way their thin lips hung open in an impressive O.
'Well I've never,' Jane gasped.
'Clearly. You should try it some time. I understand Mr Smith is so vision impaired you might have a shot there.'
Their appalled shrieks were music to my ears and I quickly made my escape.
Tags: paranormal-romance vampires vampire-romance contemporary-comedy
Do you mind if we leave here so I can chain smoke 'til I throw up so it will be easier to quit?
Robyn PetermanTags: paranormal-romance smoking vampire-romance contemporary-comedy
Annabelle was practically standing on my back. It was like wearing an Annabelle backpack.
Rose Pressey BetancourtTags: ghosts supernatural-romance contemporary-comedy
Leave before I have to rip your eyes out with my dull Lady Bic razor.
Rose Pressey BetancourtTags: paranormal vampire contemporary-comedy
She wasn't the type. Her idea of exercise was lifting a fork.
Rose Pressey BetancourtTags: vampires paranormal contemporary-comedy
While I had no intention of hooking up with him, I still wanted him to want to hook up with me.
It was the principle of the thing, after all.
Tags: paranormal-romance contemporary-comedy
I've also been known to cry during MasterCard commercials.
Kimberly RayeTags: paranormal-romance contemporary-comedy
I'd rather drink my dinner out of a martini glass and follow it up with a cosmopolitan chaser.
Kimberly RayeTags: paranormal-romance-werewolves contemporary-comedy
I could run, too, but my feet hurt. It's tough being a fashion vixen.
Kimberly RayeTags: paranormal-romance contemporary-comedy
It takes a while for the heat to work in this piece of shit, but when it kicks in, you’ll sweat like a fat whore at confession.
Robyn PetermanTags: contemporary-comedy romance-loveorary-romance
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