My first time I jacked off, I thought I'd invented it. I looked down at my sloppy handful of junk and thought, This is going to make me rich.
Chuck PalahniukTags: sex masturbation
We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.
Lily TomlinTags: men sex evolution masturbation naughty
You cannot blame porn. When I was young, I used to masturbate to Gilligan's Island.
Ron JeremyTags: television masturbation pornography
If I'm going to merely ramble, maybe I should just snuggle under the warm covers, think of Miu, and play with myself.
Haruki MurakamiTags: love masturbation rambling
Today I will masterbate!
Okay, that was a mistake. I should have written "Today I will masterbate--if I want to!
Tags: humor freedom sex masturbation
That's all anyone has, and it's always brief, although, of course, some people believe they have a past where they can accumulate things and a future where they will accumulate still more. By the way, speaking of the present moment, do you masturbate a lot?
Paulo CoelhoTags: present masturbation now
She imagined herself both queen and slave, dominatrix and victim. In her imagination she was making love with men of all skin colors--white, black, yellow--with homosexuals and beggars. She was anyone's, and anyone could do anything to her. She had one, two, three orgasms, one after another. She imagined everything she had never imagined before, and she gave herself to all that was most base and most pure.
Paulo CoelhoTags: sexuality fantasy masturbation
I wanted to put a reference to masturbation in one of the scripts for the Sandman. It was immediately cut by the editor [Karen Berger]. She told me, "There's no masturbation in the DC Universe." To which my reaction was, "Well, that explains a lot about the DC Universe.
Neil GaimanTags: humor masturbation dc-comics
Twas the night before Thanksgiving.
All the food's in the oven.
And I'm in the bedroom performin' self lovin'.
Tags: poetry food poem thanksgiving masturbation
And now Kit’s cock—which had mostly been used for taking a leak before that moment—woke up and screamed I WANT! FEED ME ASSHOLE! And Kit had given it a good handshake until it threw up.
Amy LaneTags: humorous masturbation nsfw
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