It's different now, like pushing the stop lever on my camera until nothing except the war can squeeze through the lens.

Sarah Miller

Tags: war russia russian-revolution anastasia otma romanovs tsar-nicholas



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My sisters and I sit together on a pair of suitcases. If we've forgotten anything, it's already too late -- our rooms have all been sealed and photographed. Anyway, Tatiana would say it's bad luck to return for something you've forgotten.

Sarah Miller

Tags: war russia exile russian-revolution traveling anastasia otma romanovs tsar-nicholas-ii



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We should be used to it," Tatiana reasons. "There have always been lines separating us from the rest of the world, whether they were satin ribbons or iron rails.

Sarah Miller

Tags: russia royalty russian-revolution otma romanovs tsar-nicholas



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I'll pretend, I tell myself. Pretending is safer than believing.

Sarah Miller

Tags: war russia believing russian-revolution pretending anastasia otma romanovs tsar-nicholas-ii



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Maria cries unashamedly on my shoulder while I whisper and pet her cheek, but Anastasia grips my other hand and stares fiercely back at our Alexander Palace with her wet blue eyes until it is no more than a lemon-colored speck against the sunrise.

Sarah Miller

Tags: sadness home russia russian-revolution anastasia otma tsar-nicholas-ii the-romanovs



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I wish I wasn't an imperial highness or an ex-grand duchess. I'm sick of people doing things to me because of what I am. Girl-in-white-dress. Short-one-with-fringe. Daughter-of-the-tsar. Child-of-the-ex-tyrant. I want people to look and see me, Anastasia Nikolaevna Romanova, not the caboose on a train of grand duchesses. Someday, I promise myself, no one will be able to hear my name or look at my picture and suppose they know all about me. Someday I will do something bigger than what I am.

Sarah Miller

Tags: life inspirational self russia royalty russian-revolution anastasia otma romanovs tsar-nicholas



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