Kindness suits you."

"Really? I think I'm quite allergic to it.

Derek Landy

Tags: kindness humour derek-landy allergic skulduggery-pleasant



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Stairs," Valkyrie said, disappointed.
"Not just ordinary stairs," Skulduggery told her as he led the way down. "Magic stairs."
"Really?"
"Oh, yes."
She followed him into the darkness. "How are they magic?"
"They just are."
"In what way?"
"In a magicky way."
She glared at the back of his head. "They aren't magic at all, are they?"
"Not really.

Derek Landy

Tags: humor funny magic conversation stairs valkyrie derek-landy skulduggery-pleasant



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Come and have a go, if you think you're hard enough

Derek Landy

Tags: skulduggery-pleasant tanith



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Can I just point something out?" Fletcher asked. "That is an awful plan. On a scale of one to ten - the Trojan War being a ten and General Custer verus all those Indians being a one - your plan is a zero. I don't think it is a plan at all. I think it's just a series of happenings that are, to be honest, unlikely to follow on from each other in the way in which everyone's probably hoping."
"Do you have a better plan?" Valkyrie asked.
"Of course not. I'm a man of action, not thought."
Valkyrie nodded. "You're definitely not a man of thought."
"Why are you in charge anyway? What do you know about organising something like this?"
"I have faith," Tanith said.
"As do I," said Ghastly.
Valkyrie smiled at them gratefully. "So you think the plan will work?"
"God, no," said Ghastly.
"Sorry, Val," said Tanith

Derek Landy

Tags: skulduggery-pleasant dark-days valkyrie-cain



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Stephanie had no problem doing what she
was told, just so long as she was given a good reason why she
should.

Derek Landy

Tags: reason stephanie skulduggery-pleasant



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I love you all, even those I don’t particularly like. That’s you, Beryl.

Derek Landy

Tags: love humour skulduggery-pleasant gordon-edgley



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Valkyrie Cain got out of the passenger side. She zipped up
her black jacket against the cold, and joined Skulduggery as he
walked up to the front door. She glanced at him, and saw that he was smiling.
"Stop doing that,” she sighed.
“Stop doing what?” Skulduggery responded in that gloriously velvet voice of his.
“Stop smiling. The person we want to talk to lives in the only dark house on a bright street. That’s not a good sign.”
“I didn’t realise I was smiling,” he said.
They stopped at the door, and Skulduggery made a concerted effort to shift his features. His mouth twitched
downwards. “Am I smiling now?”
“No.”
“Excellent,” he said, and the smile immediately sprang back up.

Derek Landy

Tags: smile skulduggery-pleasant valkyrie-cain



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The rain battered the cottage. Valkyrie risked a look up at Skulduggery.
“What is it?” she whispered.
“It’s a box,” he whispered back.
“What kind of box?”
“A wooden one.”
She gave him a look.

Derek Landy

Tags: box skulduggery-pleasant valkyrie-cain death-bringer



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Look, this is all very, very weird. Why are you focusing on rumours and urban legends? You haven’t even asked me any
normal questions.”
“Normal questions? Like what?”
“Like, I don’t know, like if Lynch had any enemies.”
“Did Lynch have any enemies?”
“Well, not that I know of, no.”
“Then there really was no point in me asking that, was there? Unless you wanted to distract me. You didn’t want to distract me, did you, Kenny?”
“No, that’s not—”
“Are you playing a game with me, Kenny?”
“I don’t know what you’re—”
Inspector Me leaned forward. “Did you kill him?”
“No!”
“It’d be OK if you did.”
Kenny recoiled, horrified. “How would that be OK?”
“Well,” Me said, “maybe not

Derek Landy

Tags: weird interrogation normal urban-legends skulduggery-pleasant



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It would be fun,” Skulduggery nodded. ”I like kicking Wreath in the face. I haven't had a chance to do it nearly as much as I'd like.

Derek Landy

Tags: humour derek-landy skulduggery-pleasant



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