The worst part is wondering how you’ll find the strength tomorrow to go on doing what you did today and have been doing for much too long, where you’ll find the strength for all that stupid running around, those projects that come to nothing, those attempts to escape from crushing necessity, which always founder and serve only to convince you one more time that destiny is implacable, that every night will find you down and out, crushed by the dread of more and more sordid and insecure tomorrows. And maybe it’s treacherous old age coming on, threatening the worst. Not much music left inside us for life to dance to. Our youth has gone to the ends of the earth to die in the silence of the truth. And where, I ask you, can a man escape to, when he hasn’t enough madness left inside him? The truth is an endless death agony. The truth is death. You have to choose: death or lies. I’ve never been able to kill myself.
Louis-Ferdinand CélineTags: determination survival survivor struggle-quotes struggle-strength-character suicidality
What if I just want to die?"
"Then I will be sad and disappointed that you cheated yourself out of your chance at existence. Not all of us have that opportunity, you know, to choose life.
Tags: book suicide suicidality austin suicidal-thoughts depression-quotes death-wish never-eighteen suicidal
The bravest thing I ever did was continuing my life when I wanted to die.
Juliette LewisTags: despair courage bravery suicide death-and-dying hopelessness mental-health mental-illness suicidality mental-disorder mental-health-stigma suicidal-thoughts death-wish
Not wanting the girls to endure the shame of a crazy mother, I spent my days acting as normal as possible. I walked through life, an actor in a Leave it to Beaver episode, determined to disguise all clues of my real condition until... well, until I could find an appropriate moment to do away with myself." [...]
"Yet even as my depression spiraled into ever more precarious territory, I retained an uncanny ability to disguise my true mental condition from everyone except Tom. He was my sole source of strength and he never stopped encouraging me.
Tags: despair emotion depression acting daughters hopelessness mental-health mental-illness disguise suicidality pretending dissociative-identity-disorder multiple-personality-disorder depressive mpd severe-depression suicidehopeless
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