I make love like a snake disguised as an elephant and a donkey. But I mustn’t talk about sexual congress and Congress simultaneously.


Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Mots clés humor politics love sex funny corruption congress politicians

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Love is inaudible—until you hear it. And once you do, you’ll never forget the sound of her voice.


Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Mots clés love relationships memory forget listen voice never once sound amy hear inaudible

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Making love to me is amazing. Wait, I meant: making love, to me, is amazing. The absence of two little commas nearly transformed me into a sex god.


Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Mots clés humor love writing god sex relationships funny amazement writer editing transformation lover absence amazing commas sex-god transform word-junkies

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I love like I’m thirsty. Can I offer you a tall glass of Sahara sand?


Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Mots clés humor kindness love food funny desert hospitality thirst drink thirsty sand sahara

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To find out if she really loved me, I hooked her up to a lie detector. And just as I suspected, my machine was broken.


Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Mots clés humor life honesty love deception women lies relationships funny lie denial illusion illogical honest deceit machine deny suspicion broken lie-detector word-junkies

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If you have the woman you love, what more do you need? Well, besides an alibi for the time of her husband’s murder.


Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Mots clés humor love woman women murder time relationships necessity funny crazy justification husband wife desire need insane want alibi yearn justify word-junkies

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I make love with a focus and intensity that most people reserve for sleep.

Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Mots clés humor love men women romantic romance sleep sex relationships funny sleeping intensity focus intense reserve not-romantic make-love word-junkies

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She gave me money to buy condoms, and instead I bought a book of baby names. That’s life. That’s love. That’s fiscally irresponsible.


Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Mots clés humor life money love sex funny trust responsibility babies names birth irresponsible condoms baby baby-names fiscally-irresponsible

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I love that she loves me a 10, on a 5-point scale. Well, I know it’s a 5-point scale, though I asked her on a 1-100 scale.



Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Mots clés humor love deception funny question deceit answer numbers scale deceived delirious rating rate

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If I could bronze my love, it’d be worthy of a silver medal.


Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Mots clés humor love funny value worth worthy bronze word-junkies medal silver-medal

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