A candle that smells like asshole would be an instant hit in prison.

“Who’d cum first, you or your clone? To find out, why don’t you go fuck yourself?”

“If someone is playing on my fear, the natural tendency for a person is to throw…”

“Chop off my erection. That way you don’t have to go battery-operated penis shop…”

“I used to spend a lot of time in lap pools. Growing up I was on a few swim team…”