A mustache on a stick would not only be tastier than a popsicle, but ticklier too.

“She’s not a pothead. That thing on her neck is a vase. And anyway, I’m all for …”

“The engine of my car is so powerful I could wash dishes under the hood. But tha…”

“A brick could be used as a period on a really large sentence. A blanket could b…”

“4:00 am—it’s not too early to drink wine, it’s too late. Too late by seven minu…”