A one-winged bird does not fly south for the winter. It flies south, west, north, and east, over and over. That’s how I feel when I’m in love, only I walk.

“A brick could be used like a used car salesman uses people. I know, because I u…”

“If I were a box of cereal, I wouldn’t want to talk about myself any more than I…”

“I always get whiplash when I have sex in the backseat. Boy, I sure wish Grandmo…”

“This is my logo for Mike”