A tailor walks into a lawyer, and the bar says, "I like your suit." And the tailor replies, "This morning I spotted a non-sequitur detective. Don't worry, he didn't follow me.

“A tie is like an arrow pointing to my crotch. A tie is also like an even score.”

“I made love to a woman 20 years older than me. The impressive part is that I wa…”

“The six squares of our love didn’t add up to a cube. Still, I took the oddly-sh…”

“I respect people who make eye contact (blind people get a free respect card).”