An empty room holds nothing but memories. At least it would, if I didn’t just finish packing up the last of the sadness.

“I took a shortcut and saved a ton of time. Literally 2,000 pounds of it. Now I …”

“Escalators are the offspring of elevators and stairs. Love is the progeny of pa…”

“I went to a homosexual high school. I graduated top in my class. I couldn't ima…”

“I am Mr. Needleneeds, and I’m looking for a haystack. It’s easier to find than …”