Brown ties are barely even good enough to wipe my ass with.

“The best part of the word "booboo" is the breast. While the word doesn't suck, …”

“Stop a drunk driver and you stop a murderer—even if he hasn’t killed anyone yet…”

“If someone asks you what the most popular form of transportation is, before you…”

“Eating a plain bagel with no cream cheese is like eating the inner tube of a bi…”