Cats have tongues with the texture of bricks, and fur as warm and soft as blankets.

“A blanket could be used to eradicate the radical element that’s so pervasive an…”

“Starbucks has odd drink sizes. I say man’s hands were meant to be cupped, so po…”

“Kevin Love has a last name that sums up my feelings for you. But then again, so…”

“I want to name my son Justin Case. You know, just in case.”