Chairs have legs. Four of them, like my father. Meow.

“He said that he said it—a second he, not a man named He. And not He-Man either.”

“I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. …”

“Neighbors, I’m on the fence about them.”

“I’ll grab my crotch at you. It’s a greeting, like hello, only more provocative …”