Columbus was born around 1492. I say around because before that the world was flat. My stomach also used to be flat, but now it looks like a globe is about to be born.

“I’m rich in poverty. I got no money coming out of my ass. I’m up to my neck in …”

“Money is seen as a great evil. But I've never seen a pile of cash stab someone.”

“I’m thinking about becoming a farmer and a fisherman—a hunter of swimming plant…”

“A brick and a blanket are going to help me conquer the world. Just give me an a…”