Crying about the economy is a strategy. It won’t get you a job, but it will keep Kleenex in business.

“I’ve often wondered why boxing gloves are bright red. If I were a boxer, I’d we…”

“I had a dream where I drank my own grandma. What she was doing disguised as a b…”

“Who needs a large vocabulary when you can just make up any word at any time? It…”

“My penis is like a wet noodle, only not as thick. Or tasty.”