Don’t do something today you’ll regret for the next 10,000 tomorrows. No, you should have done that yesterday.

“Should I masturbate before we meet up? I don’t want to be horny and thinking wi…”

“Birthdays are like presidential elections. I don’t like them, but they still ke…”

“I am the Wakeboard of Love, if you catch my drift.”

“When you’re a cartographer, having to make maps sort of comes with the territor…”