Don’t lift my words without permission. It might lead to a hernia.

“The state of North Carolina, Daisy, and John Wayne walked into a bar, and I sho…”

“A brick could be used like a simile, and I’d like it. But not as much as I’d li…”

“If I were a box of cereal, I wouldn’t want to talk about myself any more than I…”

“Love is 90% what life is about, plus or minus 10%. Of course, I just made both …”