Drive, guy. That green light isn’t going to get a deeper green. It’ll only ripen and turn yellow.

“A pastor, a politician, and a brick walk into a bar, and the bartender says, “S…”

“A writer should be a recluse. Why share words with a few friends in the moment …”

“My hair isn’t turning gray, but it is losing its flavor. It used to taste like …”

“I’ll show you my nipples if you show me yours. It’s a good deal, because I’m of…”