Even a fool recognizes that there is great sadness in a bucket of tears. But only a wise man thinks to conserve water and use that bucket to wash his car.

“The only thing politicians serve is their own interest. Public servant has morp…”

“The way I wrestle five-year-olds makes me think if I were ever attacked by a pa…”

“I don’t get offended when you talk about the Japanese. Not because I’m not one,…”

“I postulate that there is something stickier than semen. That substance is love.”