Faith: a device of the mind, fed by the soul, that functions like crutches to a man in a wheelchair.

“If I wanted to eat leftovers, I wouldn’t have taken a dump in the Tupperware.”

“With the economic depression and unemployment at record levels, at least I have…”

“A brick could be used as a cock block. 
”

“I respect my elders, but I don’t respect the Myelders, who are my neighbors, be…”