Hey, you created me! I didn't create some loser alter-ego to make myself feel better. Take some responsibility!

“The cancer I don't have is everywhere now.”

“Today is the sort of day where the sun only comes up to humiliate you.”

“Arson, kidnapping, I think I'm up to murder. Maybe all this will get me just a …”

“About my boss, Tyler tells me, if I'm really angry, I should go to the post off…”