I am the sphinx of love. But I didn’t used to be. I used to be a sphink—which has the head of a human and the body of a pen.

“I want to write a song called “Two Straws and a Spoon,” about one man being cuc…”

“I have good news and I have bad news. The good news is that your house hasn't b…”

“After I’m famous, I want my statue to be made out of beige Jell-O, and I want t…”

“Love is a blue balloon that wants to be orange. Go Gators!”