I can’t do a round off, but I can round off to the nearest back handspring.

“A brick could be used as a substitute for the brother I never had. It seems rid…”

“A brick could be used as a Sexual Orientation Device. But I don’t need it, beca…”

“Most of the time, I feel like Phelps. At least when I’m not winning Olympic gol…”

“My job is so boring I’m thinking of boring a second hole into my penis.”