I didn’t chug the hairspray because I’m an alcoholic. I drank it to style my throat hairs.

“The only drink I like ice in is water, because you can’t water down water. I’m …”

“I wouldn’t mind politicians lying to me, stealing from me, or senselessly makin…”

“To me, love is either a pebble, a rock, or a boulder. Or a grain of sand, if yo…”

“I have a star on Hollywood Blvd. It glows in the dark and I stuck it there myse…”