I don't understand people who say they need more "Me Time." What other time is there? Do these people spend part of their day in someone else's body?

“I’m a nail biter. Not when I’m nervous, but when I misplace my hammer.”

“Keys, they make it easier to get in and out of doors. So does invisibility.”

“My asshole smells like a paper mill. Three cheers for being a writer.”

“My lawyer’s name is Mr. Dentist. I have him on retainer. The police may think I…”