I found panties in the chimney, and they’re not mine. They must belong to a fire crotch.

“The clouds rolled over the hills like a pack of midgets wearing gray togas some…”

“If my chest grew cat hair, I wouldn’t know whether to pluck it or pet it.”

“If I could sleep with any literary character, I’d love to sleep with The Cat in…”

“I can feel my cheeks through your cheesecake buttocks.”