I have extremely great aim when it comes to peeing. I can, for instance, manage to not splash a single drop on the rim of the toilet, even when standing five feet away and from behind the shower curtain.

“I have bread, water, and love—what more can a man ask for? How about pasta, win…”

“Michael Phelps collects huhs. Huh? His mouth said nothing, but his actions said…”

“Kevin Love has a last name that sums up my feelings for you. But then again, so…”

“A blanket could be used to say I’m sorry without using words, gestures, body la…”