I have so many pet peeves that I can’t even pet them all. And damn I wish they were furry.

“A blanket could be used to find the Brick of Truth. Many lies will be layered o…”

“A blanket could be frozen and used to cool off a warm body as you slowly thaw i…”

“2 out of 4 numbers prefer being in the bottom 50 percent. Half of all lovers al…”

“My banana is decomposing in my pocket. I was happy to see you, but now I’m brow…”