I like sex. Let’s get a group together. You know, for a better discount.

“I had a dream I took the form of Chuck Norris and kicked your ass. Then I impre…”

“Strawberries are so red they make me feel 33% patriotic.”

“When tragedy hits close to home, like your neighbor’s house, it really makes yo…”

“I don’t like sleeping, but I do like watching the inside of my eyelids. That’s …”